Working with Grief and Emotion in High-Conflict International Family Mediation
From hidden loss to sustainable agreements

Workshop description

International family mediation often appears legal or procedural, yet is deeply driven by emotion and loss. Cross-border separation, cultural differences, and distance between parents and children intensify both conflict and grief.

This in-person training focuses on the connection between grief and conflict, introducing a practical Grief–Conflict perspective. Participants learn how unacknowledged loss can fuel escalation, and how recognising emotions can open pathways toward de-escalation and sustainable agreements.

The training is highly interactive, using a variety of engaging methods, with ample space for questions and participants’ input. Concrete tools are provided, along with clear guidance on how to use them. Participants explore at which stage of the mediation process these tools can be most effective. We also highlight the different experiences and needs of the primary decision-maker and the follower.

Participants will:

• recognise hidden grief beneath conflict behaviour
• understand how emotions shape decision-making
• learn practical tools and when to apply them in mediation
• explore how to identify underlying needs and foster recognition
• strengthen their role and resilience as mediators

This training supports mediators in moving beyond positions, working more effectively with emotions, and facilitating durable, balanced agreements.

Veerle Lisabeth has a legal background and a broad, critical perspective. During her studies, she developed a strong interest in philosophy and has since been convinced that “closed models” do not exist. She combined her legal education with international experiences, including studies in France, Germany, and Boston. She built a versatile career in which she was active in politics for more than twelve years and previously worked as a family lawyer.

Over time, she came to realize that confrontation is not the way to deal with differences of opinion, which led her to consciously reorient her career towards mediation and conflict guidance. Personal challenges further deepened her understanding of stress, resilience, and human dynamics, and became an important catalyst in her development.

Today, she works as a mediator, trainer, and speaker, guiding individuals and groups in dealing with conflict, always with a focus on self-reliance and growth, and increasingly using an approach based on needs, interests, and the functioning of the brain. In addition, she is actively involved in a non-profit organization that advocates for the rights of children in divorce situations, and she has organized webinars in which Ukrainian mediators were able to participate free of charge after the war.

Transformative Cross-Border Mediation in Hague Child Abduction Cases

Workshop description

International parental child abduction cases place parents, children, lawyers, courts, Central Authorities and mediators under exceptional pressure. The legal framework asks for speed: return proceedings must move quickly, voluntary return and amicable resolution should be explored without creating delay, and any mediated conversation takes place in the shadow of urgent legal questions about habitual residence, return, contact, parental responsibility and the child’s future.

At the same time, the parents usually arrive in mediation at a moment when their interaction has become highly destabilized. They may feel unheard, threatened, blamed, exhausted, legally exposed or deeply uncertain about what is possible. Communication may have collapsed entirely. In these circumstances, mediation is often expected to be efficient, legally aware and child-focused, while also leaving room for the parents’ own decision-making.

This workshop explores how a full cross-border family mediation in a Hague return case can be conducted from a transformative orientation. Rather than treating mediation primarily as a structured negotiation toward settlement, the transformative approach understands conflict as a crisis in human interaction. The mediator’s role is to support party empowerment and inter-party recognition: greater clarity, deliberation and choice for each parent, and greater capacity to hear and consider the other parent’s experience where this becomes possible.

Participants will work with a recorded simulation of a cross-border Hague mediation, following the case from first contact and preparation through key moments in the mediation conversation. The workshop will use an “inside out” format: selected video segments will be paused, replayed and analysed in detail. Participants will examine what the mediator is attending to, why a particular intervention is made or not made, and how practices such as reflection, summary and check-in can support party choice without the mediator taking control of the outcome.

The case will also make visible the wider cross-border setting in which the mediation takes place. This includes the role of the Central Authority, the timing and procedural pressure of Hague return proceedings, confidentiality and legal-process boundaries, and the practical coordination needed when parents, children and institutions are located in different countries. A specific part of the workshop will consider how a case manager from UMPOD, the Czech Central Authority, may be involved in the case context without displacing the parents’ agency in mediation.

Martina Cirbusova is President of the Institute for the Study of Conflict Transformation (ISCT) and Director of the Mediation and Education Center and the Marriage and Family Counseling Center in Brno. Her professional work brings together mediation, transformative conflict intervention, interdisciplinary cooperation and family conflict resolution, with a strong focus on the best interests and participatory rights of children.

Martina is an ISCT-certified transformative mediator. She was named an ISCT Fellow and member of the ISCT Board of Directors in 2023 and was subsequently elected President of the Institute. She regularly trains mediators and conflict professionals in Europe and the United States and contributes to the international development of standards for transformative mediation practice.

Her work is especially relevant to cross-border family mediation because it connects the transformative mediator’s stance with the institutional reality of family conflict: courts, child welfare authorities, counselling services, lawyers and helping professions. Since 2016, Martina has supported the implementation of interdisciplinary cooperation in various regions of the Czech Republic and the introduction of participatory practices in family justice settings. She is also the co-author, with Robin Brzobohaty and Joseph P. Folger, of Transformative Conflict Resolution. Mediation – Dialogue – Coaching (Kluwer Law International, 2025), a comprehensive professional text on transformative approaches to mediation, dialogue and coaching.

Robin Brzobohaty is a mediator, supervisor, instructor and team coach specialising in transformative dialogue, family systems, children’s rights and the organisation of mediation services. He is a staff mediator and team leader at the Mediation and Education Center in Brno. Since 2025, he has also worked at the Ministry of Justice of the Czech Republic, focusing on the conceptual framework for mediation and mediator training, and he is a research fellow at Silesian University in Opava, Faculty of Public Policy.

Robin is an ISCT Fellow, an ISCT-certified mediator and an examiner for the Czech Ministry of Justice mediator certification exam. As a senior mediator, he has mediated more than 4,000 cases and has led experiential training in transformative mediation in the Czech Republic and abroad, including the United States, Germany, Denmark and Russia. He teaches mediation at Charles University in Prague and Masaryk University in Brno.

His background is directly connected to the theme of this workshop. Robin is a graduate of the MiKK training programme in cross-border family mediation. Between 2015 and 2020, he founded and led the international mediation programme at the Office for International Legal Protection of Children in Brno, the Czech Central Authority in international child protection matters, and served as the Czech contact person for communication with the European Parliament mediator for international parental child abduction cases. His research and publications focus on recognition theory, self-determination in mediation, children’s participatory rights, screening for violence in family disputes, family law, child protection and the digitisation of judicial services. His last piece is Transformative Conflict Resolution: Mediation, Coaching, Dialogue (Kluwer Law International, 2025), together with Martina Cirbusová and Joseph P. Folger.

Co-Mediation as a Powerful Approach in Family Mediation

Workshop description

Family mediation often involves complex legal, emotional, and relational challenges. These complexities are further amplified in cases involving separation, divorce and particularly in cross-border family disputes, including parental child abduction cases, where different legal systems, languages, cultures, and family expectations intersect. In such situations, co-mediation offers an effective, dynamic, and enriching approach that enables mediators to respond more comprehensively to the needs of families.

Co-mediation refers to the practice of two mediators working together throughout the mediation process, combining their skills and different professional (gender, cultural, linguistic) backgrounds to support parties in conflict more effectively.

The concept of co-mediation is rooted in the idea that mediation can benefit from multiple perspectives and shared responsibility. By working as a team, co-mediators can model constructive communication, balance power dynamics, and respond more flexibly to the needs of the parties. This approach is particularly valuable in emotionally intense or multi-layered disputes, where one mediator alone may find it challenging to address all relational, cultural, or psychological aspects simultaneously – which is particularly relevant in Cross-border family cases.

This highly interactive workshop is designed for family mediators who wish to deepen their co-mediation practice and further develop their collaborative skills. Participants will explore different models of collaboration between mediators, including role-sharing, communication strategies, and methods for effective coordination before, during, and after mediation sessions.

Through experiential exercises, role plays, and guided reflection, participants will have the opportunity to experience co-mediation

Michaela is a retired attorney with a long-standing focus on family law, where she advised and represented clients in separation cases, divorces and child custody with often complex and sensitive issues. Over the course of her career as a Lawyer, she developed a deep understanding of the emotional and legal challenges that family disputes often involve. Mediation offers a more sustainable alternative to litigation and helps preserve relationships that might otherwise be damaged through court proceedings.

Therefore, in addition to her legal practice, she completed a two-year training as a mediator and is a qualified and registered mediator since 2008. As a mediator she supports individuals and families in resolving conflicts in a constructive and solution focussed way.

Michaela is actively involved as board member in mediation associations, holds workshops and trainings and advocates for the advancement of mediation on a political level.

In order to improve her skills even more she just finished a 2 ½ year training in psychosocial counselling.

Sabine Lehrbauer is an experienced social worker with a long-standing focus on child and youth welfare and educational leadership. Throughout her career, she has developed a deep understanding of the complex psychosocial dynamics within families and educational institutions, particularly in her roles as an educational director and department head.

For her, mediation and psychosocial counseling are essential tools for resolving conflicts sustainably and promoting the personal development of individuals during challenging life phases. Therefore, in addition to her practical experience in education, she completed comprehensive training as a registered mediator and supervisor, and successfully earned a Master’s degree in psychosocial counseling. As an independent mediator and consultant, she now supports individuals and organizations in finding constructive and solution-oriented ways out of crises.

Sabine Lehrbauer is also actively involved as a board member of the umbrella organization Network Mediation Austria, teaches at universities, and, as an expert in competency diagnostics, advocates for professional development in the psychosocial field.